From the Center for Small Orchestra

I was blocked initially composing this piece. To unblock l used the mouse and clicked on various notes at random. From the result, other motives and eventually themes grew and I knew my inspiration.

From the Center examines the experience of first noticing the effect of earlier trauma: the chaos, uncertainty, dissociated memory. Then, gradually, we expereince fragments and reoccuring themes, telling us truths about our past. Though often we find it diffcut to intrepret these correctly, they reoccur as themes and thus guide our trauma work. Since these themes remain consistent, encouraged we continue. More comes to mind and slowly imagery which suggests the trauma, however tragedy, appears. As these images grow, more actual memory returns, and flashbacks, which come from triggered traumatic memory storage in the limbic system of the brain, appear. These play back events as thoguh a video camera shot the scene. As all of this, the safer factional images, the memories, often a bit distorted, and flashbacks, add to our experience, we develop stronger themes and stories to tell. A narrative forms and after a long trial we find peace in the story , the retrieved memory, and the feelings resolves after, in some cases, many, many, long years. The work is not done, until our bodies inform us we may be relieved; we feel together and at peace.